Out with the old and in with the new!

Any runner who denies having fears, nerves, or some other kind of disposition is a bad athlete, or a liar. – Gordon Pirie

Sooooooo I found this quote in a Runner’s World magazine a few months ago, and when I was thinking about the month of October, it really seemed to fit the theme the month brought on.

I know, I know, I made one post in the beginning of October and then nothing!  Believe me, I wasn’t thrilled with the fact that I didn’t make more posts or even run more… October was a pretty crazy month for me, I finally got back in the workforce and started my new job at Ruby Memorial Hospital on the NICU (neonatal intensive care unit).  I have only been on the unit for two weeks, this week will make three, and I have already learned so much and become more amazed with treatments and the care that is provided to these neonates.  I am so thankful to have a job again, and I’m even more thankful that there are plenty of kind, helpful staff members on my unit to help me get the ins and outs of the unit.  I’m not gonna lie though, the first day was rough and I only mainly observed.  This was the first time I had worked a 12 hour shift in like 10 months!  I found it easier to make it through the work day after that though.  Working 12 hour shifts also left little time in the day to run, more like no time because I’m commuting about 45 minutes each way to work, and I’m not complaining, I just needed to figure out how I would be able to get all of my runs in and make them quality runs.

The 26th of October, Josh and I were signed up to participate in the Fairmont Night Glow race, a race that I had done the year before.  It’s a pretty fun race, for those of you who know Fairmont, you start on the Gateway Connector (a really big bridge/road/on-ramp that leads to the interstate, making it more convenient for those living in the middle of fairmont, to get to the interstate) and you race through fairmont, at night.  Runners wear glow accessories and bright clothes and it’s a pretty fun night.  Except that this year the course wasn’t even a full 5K.  Josh and I both have Garmin GPS watches, and I’m pretty sure two of them wouldn’t be wrong.  I’m not trying to be a bummer Betty, but we both would’ve had PR’s because the first mile of the course is down hill and the rest is flat!!!! (yes, there’s plenty of frustration in that typing).  Anywho, Josh won the thing, and the clock said I ran a 5K in 25 minutes… HA HA HA!  It was a cold, but pretty fun evening overall.

Me, with that pre-glow run, glow!

After a week of thinking about it, I decided that I just wouldn’t run on the days that I worked and I would kick up the mileage on the days when I didn’t work.  This has been going pretty well for the most part, this week, I have a block where I have five days off in a row (today is day 4 of 5), and with my long run being today… let’s just say my legs really felt running five days in a row.  The first two minutes of my run went pretty well aaaaaaaand then I rolled my ankle on some really awesome tree branches and fell… I didn’t even make it a half mile into my run and I freakin fell!  I still had like 9.whatever miles to go.  Luckily I didn’t actually hurt my body, just my pride, and I was able to eek through the rest of the run.

Back to the quote at the beginning of the post, I get nervous before I run races and even before a long run by myself, a little bit because I want to do well, but more because of the unknown.  I don’t know how I’m going to do in the race, will I run too fast, too slow, and as far as long runs go, it’s been a while since I’ve done some longer runs (I ran 9 and 10 miles for the first time since the marathon this past April), and I’m learning that it’s okay to be uncomfortable; to embrace the unknown.  The job that I started this month pushes me out of my comfort zone each and every time that I’m there, AND I LOVE IT!  It’s an amazing feeling when you are able to prove yourself wrong, and learn that your fears aren’t that scary.  No matter what we do in our lives, we will face uncertainty and be a little nervous about something, and that is okay.  Anyone who says they aren’t worried about something, is just plain crazy, that’s basically what Gordon Pirie said, and he was an Olympian so….